Flood of strife

Proverbs 17:14

The beginning of strife is like letting out water, 

so quit before the quarrel breaks out. 

This struck me as I read it. 

The beginning of strife..... the start of conflict, resentment, bitterness, anger, disagreement, is like leaving the tap on. Starts as a little stream, but it can end up flooding the whole household. 

The trick, as this proverb says is to stop it before it even drips. Much better to learn how to do that rather than to fix the damage of a flood. A flood of words does considerably more damage than a flood of water. So, for our own lives and the sake of those around us we must learn to tame ourselves. 

Learning to 'hold our tongue' is an incredible skill. One that I'm still battling about, so easy to let things slip. I have realised I need to be on guard a lot more than I am, because before I know it I end up saying stuff I don't even mean, or know where it's come from. Do you ever feel like that? 

I don't want to flood the lives around me with strife, so I need to learn how to turn off the strife. I need to learn how to not be angry, bitter or disagreeable. How can I do that? 

Like my kids, I find it hard to just stop doing something. I have to have an alternative avenue to go down. There must be a different route because just not doing something is hard. I must do something.

So, I'm thinking, what's the opposite of strife? Peace, contentment, being in accord. 

If the strife is towards a person. Instead of concentrating on the point of disagreement, I can focus on the good. The things that I admire about them, the good characteristics they display. I can learn to be thankful for them. Not living in a place of discontent or resentment, but having an attitude of gratitude. 

I'm going to give it a try, I'm fed up of the turmoil that strife produces, of the dripping with negative emotions that eventually bring a flood. 

Overcome anger

Proverbs 16:32

Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, 

and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city. 

You have great power - do you know that? 

The power this verse speaks of is not physical strength, but the great power and ability of self-control.

Getting angry is easy, it's easy to see things that annoy us in everyday life. 

Confession time: one of my great annoyances is that people don't put their shoes away, seems silly, but it gets on my nerves! They are in the way when you want to get in the door or down the stairs, let alone a trip hazard... - see it's easy to take something and wind ourselves up with it. What is harder is to go through the daily routine of asking everyone to put their shoes away, every day, even several times a day. This has been going on for years now - the shoe fiasco, yet it's a daily request I put before my family. I shall truly rejoice the day the floor is uncluttered with shoes! 

The thing is, I have a choice in all this.

I can choose to think along the lines of 'why haven't they got it by now?', but what benefit would that be to everyone? It would increase the anger level for everyone which isn't the end result I want. The amount of explaining and imploring I do doesn't matter, everyone probably knows my explanations off by heart by now so there's no point going over it everyday. Yet, the shoes remain. So, for my own peace it is now a daily request, not an argument or sore point. Yes, it is annoying. Don't get me wrong -every time I see the shoes piled up all over the place I kind of sigh with agitation, but better that than dwell on it and allow anger to take over.

Now, I know my example probably seems really silly to some of you, it's probably not something that everyone would get agitated by, but we all have our everyday annoyances. What I would like you to ask yourself is, how does it effect you and those around you? Do you explode in a fit of anger, or silently seethe resentment? Both reactions don't do you any good.

Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, 

and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city. 

Imagine what it would be like to overcome something of that anger. 

To not allow the daily irritations to culminate in you feeling angry. It not easy. It takes practice, patience and perseverance and sometimes even then we lose it a bit. What I'd like you to know is -  it is possible to not be overcome by anger. 

It is down to you. Not anyone else. 

You have the amazing ability to control your reactions. You have been given a strong will. It is your responsibility to use it. 

Reading the above verse, I hope, empowers you. It shows that the strength inside of you is greater than the strength required to overcome cities! You have the ability, the strength to control your responses. It's easy to get carried away with ourselves and exercise no self-control, yet you will feel powerless not powerful.

I pray that as you read this, you will be motivated and strengthened to demonstrate the power of self-control within you so that your spirit becomes mighty. You are a conqueror. Being able to conquer inner turmoil is a greater victory than overcoming a city. 

What are your motives?

Proverbs 16:2

All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, 

but the Lord weighs the spirit. 

We choose our actions. 

We design our own moral code where we decide that what we are doing is right.  Even when we know we are wrong, we convince ourselves we are right, ever done that? We do or say something we know we shouldn't, find our excuses (we usually call them reasons, but they are excuses) then we declare ourselves right by our own reasoning. So that we are 'pure' in our own eyes. We are in the clear according to our own sense of morality. We have justified our actions and declared ourselves, 'pure'. But we are only in the clear in our own eyes, probably not in anyone else's, and as for in God's eyes? 

If you think about it, if we even feel the need to justify ourselves, that indicates in itself that we are, deep down, probably not satisfied with our actions. We only need to justify ourselves if we feel our actions could be brought into question. So really, we know that our motives are not actually, 'pure' anyway. As for matching it up to God's expectations, well, there's no doubting that we probably all fall short!

God sees all we do. 

He sees it all. 

Every bit of our life. 

He sees the things we do and don't do, and he 'weighs our spirit'. God doesn't just look at our actions, He is interested in what informed your actions in the first place - your spirit. Suddenly that's much more serious. 

Justifying my actions is one thing, but the crux of the matter is that our actions are an overflow of what goes on deeper inside of us. They originate in our spirit. 

Our actions aren't just things we do - they are the overflow of how our spirit is. There's a popular song that has the phrase 'my soul is well'. Is yours well? 

Is that what is displayed through your actions? 

Whatever is going on in your spirit is not hidden, even though we think it is - we display it through our words and actions. 

So today, Determine your motives. What do yr actions say about the wellness of your spirit? 

Even if you won't spend time considering your motives, God will! 

Living in the light

I have been reminded this week of the passage in Revelation 21 where it speaks of a new Jerusalem which God has prepared. It's an incredible image. If you don't know what I'm talking about check it out. 

Just try to imagine it, it's incredible. Like nothing we have ever seen before. This new city is glorious, it sparkles. The gates are pearls, the roads of gold, the walls are jasper, and the foundations are even made with jewels! Wow! What a place!

The passage goes onto say that there is no sun or moon because God is the light that shines in the city. His light never goes out, so it's daytime all the time. 

That struck me - There will be no night, no darkness. Only light. 

This got me thinking - Why no darkness? 

Darkness can be scary for some, so that's a relief in itself. 

Things don't always seem what they are when it's dark. If it's light all the time, you can see things as they are. There's a sense of truth in light - things are revealed. 

There's no hiding when it's light either. There can be no sneaking around, doing things we know we shouldn't. If we are honest, most of the things we do that we are ashamed of we don't reveal in broad daylight. We might sneak, lie, cheat, hide our secret sins. In this place though, this new Jerusalem, this heavenly, holy city of God, there can be none of that. 

Honestly, that scares me a bit, I don't know about you, but this made me realise that I'd better get some practice in before I get there! I am not perfect, I know I do things wrong, and I also don't do some of the things I know I should. I need the practice of living in this holy city of constant light now, because I want to live there - do you? 

So, I have made a decision. I am going to do my best to live like that light is here all the time. If you're a Christian like me, then you should be aware that God's presence is with you. That unbelievable light is surrounding you now, and every moment - do you live like it does? I know I haven't, and I'm determined to change that.

The reality of this means you might have some habits you need to drop, and some new ones you need to pick up. It's not about just not doing certain things, but also doing things that we know we should. 

I have known I should pray or talk to people at times and missed it because I was scared. Scared of what? People. People of all things, more scared of people than God. How ridiculous does that sound in relation to this passage?!!!! 

I am writing this down as a reminder and challenge to myself and others who, like me who want to get to that city. I am going to do my best to remember God's light is around me all the time. To live as if I'm in the city right now, not as if it's a far off promise. The reality is, none of us know when we are going to get there. None of us know when our lives will end, so I am going to start preparing now for eternity, after all I'm going to be there for far longer than I walk this Earth! 

Are you ready to take the challenge of living in the light?

the city has no need of sun or moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and its lamp is the Lamb. By it's light will the nations walk, and the kings of the earth will bring their glory into it, and it's gates will never be shut by day—and there will be no night there. They will bring into it the glory and the honor of the nations. But nothing unclean will ever enter it, nor anyone who does what is detestable or false, but only those who are written in the Lamb's book of life.

Revelation 21:23-27

Are you a gold ring in a pig's snout?

Proverbs 11:22

Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout 

is a beautiful woman without discretion. 

What is the point of putting something pretty and precious in the snout of a pig? I don't understand it. It doesn't give the ring or the pig greater value, in fact it decreases the worth of the ring. 

In this proverb, the woman is compared to a gold ring. A gold ring by itself is beautiful and precious, it has value, worth, it is worth having and displaying, but when it's attached to a pig's nose, yuck! Who would want to have a ring like that?

So what is this parable actually saying? If a woman is a gold ring, what she attaches herself to must be important. A gold ring is to be used, it isn't created just to sit somewhere, it is made to be admired and used. There's a propose to the creation of the ring. Just as women are to be admired and have purpose. 

What our character displays depends on what our use can be. I myself do not wish to be a pig's ornament! Do you? How do we avoid it? 

This proverb says that if a woman lacks discretion then she is like the ring in a pig's snout, so discretion is important. 

What is discretion?

Discretion is about being aware of what we say and do. Being careful that our words and actions do not cause offence, harm or reveal what should be private. It concerns what we wear, what our behaviour shows and what our words reveal. Being discrete is not being a gossip, not being flirtatious or showing off our beautiful bodies unnecessarily. 

Being discrete is subtle and gentle in words and action. 

For me, I know I am not always subtle in speech. I need to be more careful with the way I speak. I need to consider my speech before I open my mouth because I don't want to upset or offend anyone. It's usually with those I'm closest to that I'm less discrete, so I need to work on that. It's easy to just spill it all out sometimes without considering the consequences of our words. I need to work on that. 

When I was younger I didn't understand why it mattered what I wear, as a teenager (I wince at what I used to wear now!), I was certainly not very discrete. Looking at this verse, it's more than what we want to do or how we feel comfortable, it's about caring more about other people than ourselves. I might like a particular outfit, doesn't mean I should wear it -why do I like that outfit? Is it because it shows off a nice pair of legs, or a nice curvy body? Thinking of it that way doesn't make it sound too discrete does it? If we do or say things to show off, this is not discretion. 

I don't think anyone would want to live their lives thinking they have been an adornment for a pig's nose. So, I encourage you to check over your life and see how you're doing. If we think about it, we can probably think of people we could put into the 'lacking discretion' category, is there any area in your life that it could apply to you too? 

You are a beautiful gold ring, precious and worthy, crafted to be of value and to shine. What are you doing with those qualities?